Wasn’t invited to my sister’s baby shower. Am I right to be hurt?

Question

I get on FB today and see all these posts from my stepmother, sister, and a bunch of cousins about my sister’s shower. I do live about 4 hours away, and likely wouldn’t have gone anyway but I’m pretty hurt that I wasn’t even invited. Plus a number of family members who live even farther away were there or posted comments where they were clearly invited. I’ve been planning to bring gifts when I visit my family in about 6 weeks, but I could have sent them, or at least said “sorry I can’t be there, but see you soon.” Or I might have even gone down. This isn’t the first time I’ve been left out of things like this and it just makes me sad. 😞  Am I being too sensitive?

Answer

It would hurt my feelings too. But, it sounds like you possibly never come to them for events and it upsets them. I’d just assume they knew you wouldn’t go so didn’t even bother inviting you.

Answer

I would ask if they sent you an invitation. It could've been lost in the mail.

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I would've been hurt too, just because you're likely to say no doesn't mean they shouldn't invite you. You've got 2 options here, you confront them, and just ask if you missed the invite and that you were sorry to miss the shower. Let them know you've got gifts and would like to figure out a time to get together to celebrate the new baby. Or you let it go, and don't say anything and just accept the relationship for what it is.

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Are you two close? Strained relationship at all?

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Did you make a habit of not going? That could be why the invites stopped.

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Playing devil's advocate for a second, did she plan the baby shower herself? Maybe it was the person was organized it who forgot to invite you, if it was a surprise party she wouldn't have known they skipped you until the party. 
(Even if that was the case, she should have called you to ask why you weren't there.)
This has happened to me with my family and I know how it feels. She should have invited you even if she knew the chances that you could come were slim, if only to make you feel like your are thought of as part of the family. 
When my cousin (who grew up next door to me and I considered like my little sister) didn't invite me to her wedding I was so hurt because it made me feel like they don't consider me a part of the family anymore. I made the mistake of telling my mom who then told her, so she sent me an invitation a few weeks later in the mail, didn't even bother to call me and explain or write me a note, wth was it supposed to be a souvenir? When I opened the envelope and saw what it was it went to the trash.
Anyway, maybe talk to her directly, don't be angry but rather let her know how hurt you were.

Answer

It’s about the baby and celebrating a new life you’ll have plenty of opportunities later to celebrate that with her!

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Though it is hurtful, maybe she didn’t do it to be malicious but already new you weren’t coming.

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They may have just accidentally missed inviting you. Have you asked them about it?

Wasn’t invited to my sister’s baby shower. Am I right to be hurt?

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