post break up dream brings all the hurt back

ill make this as short as possible. i just need to vent. anybody listening is much appreciated ❤️❤️

my ex broke up with me 3 months ago out of nowhere. we’d been together for 2 years. i thought everything was fine. because of college we had to be long distance some of the time. he broke up with me because he said he couldn’t take it anymore. it was very strange and totally blindsided me, but that’s a whole other story. long story short- im better off now being single.

for him being my first love and my longest relationship so far, i haven’t been thinking about him as much as one would think since the break up. the first couple weeks were very hard, a lot of crying. but since then, practically nothing. i think i’m just numb now. and i’ve been working on myself and living my best life, hooking up with guys and all that stuff (call me a slut, i don’t care, it’s helped me move on).

but last night i had this super strange dream. my dreams are very vivid and i usually remember all of them. i haven’t had a dream about my ex in a very long time. but last night he was in my dream, telling me how sorry he was and how he’d realized he’d made a huge mistake. and how he missed me and realized that he’d taken me for granted. basically he was saying everything he should to get me to want him back. and it almost didn’t even feel like a dream , it felt so realistic. i asked him all the questions i would in real life. and it’s just gotten me thinking about him again, and i hate it. i was doing fine forgetting about him.

we haven’t spoken at all in 3 months, i haven’t looked at his social media in 3 months. this dream just came outta nowhere. i hate it