Changing my mind.

Has anyone else been trying so long that they don’t even know if they want kids anymore ? ..... I hate to say that out loud, but I really can’t help it.. I don’t know if I’ll be a good mom, my partner and I will be good parents, if a child might make me miserable and restricting me from doing as I please might be depressing.. maybe these feelings are defence mechanisms to protect me because it’s been so long and confusing and useless...

It’s hard to tell. Any thoughts? Anyone else been here/agree ?