Pour my heart out

Ladies, I just have to type this out to vent.

Has anyone been in my shoes?

My husband and I got pregnant on our second month of trying back in 2015. Had our beautiful son July 2016.

However in April when I was 7mo pregnant my husband was diagnosed with Hodgkin’s lymphoma. He started treatment soon after, but one of my questions was about more kids down the road- and the oncologist kind of made one statement like- you could bank Sperm now- that was it. But I was already 7mo along, just lost my job and now all this.

In 9/17 he was re diagnosed again so before he started a different cycle of chemo, we banked sperm but there wasn’t much there because his body hasn’t had time to recover.

In spring on 18 my husband had a stem cell transplant along with high doses of chemo, 2 full body radiations.

Now please tell me why a young man at that age, where it says on the live Strong website that if you want to preserve fertility they should shield the genital area.

Getting to the point here,

We wanted to see about trying for more children so we made an appointment with a reproductive urologist and he had a semen analysis… Now that we are one year out from his stem cell transplant and he had a perfect pet scan, “thank you Jesus. “

We just had our appointment yesterday and the doctor basically told us that my husband has no sperm and he is probably sterile for life.

Her suggestion was that if we do IVF, which she said is our only option, that we probably need to have donor sperm as a back up in case if the few sperm that my husband banked over a year ago would not survive.

We left the office and I just broke down in tears. We have just been through so much, and God has truly brought us through it all but I just can’t believe this is happening.

I know NO ONE wants to have fertility issues, and I feel so badly for my husband that he will think this is HIS Fault.

We are blessed to have our son, and my husband health, but it doesn’t change the fact that I have a desire for more children.

I just don’t know what to do or think. IVF from a physical standpoint and also financial. We are from Pittsburgh.

Thanks if you’ve read this far.