Guys, I know the mother in law and sister in law topics are in abundance here but I need advice from outside parties.

I've been open in my comments on Glow about how there is no love lost between my in-laws and myself. I've mentioned how not only did my MIL and SIL not attend our wedding, but how they also tried to stop it (my sister in law gaslighted me into saying stuff about their mom over WhatsApp and then sent the conversation to her mom who printed it and gave it to my husband days before our wedding, telling him to open in private as this is what's being said about her (nothing I wouldn't say to her face and nothing my husband doesn't know I said)). My sister in law also told my husband that there are plenty of other fish in the sea amongst other things (trying to get him to see he hasn't even explored other women and things etc).

Since we've been living together (for 12 years) my sister in law has visited us ONCE and my mother in law never.

They used to be nice to me in the beginning but I was a "yes man" back then and they stopped being nice to me when I stopped saying yes. In fact, my mother in law, twice my age, told me I was denying her the right to earn a living and provider for her children when I was 20, because I didn't want her to work my shifts anymore (paid per hour) so she could earn overtime.

My sister in law was so nasty to my husband as well. Wouldn't talk to him the whole week but then on Friday would ask him to take her to a party. Belittled him in front of his friends. Hit him with sticks. One of her boyfriends phoned my husband in a panic because he tried to break up with her and not only did she strip in the street, but once he got her inside she threatened him with a knife and the police had to be called.

My mother in law bad mouthed me to all who would listen, would walk out of shops when she saw me, etc.

I would still wish them both happy birthday and merry Christmas every year, even if I got no answer. I actually only stopped this last year. My sister in law seems to think she was a victim growing up and that her success is hers and hers alone and my husband is a hater for telling her otherwise (my in laws literally paid for everything she wanted to do and encouraged her to move towards the career she's in now. My husband had to pay for his own community college education and didn't finish because it was too hard for him to work enough hours to afford college and still attend. He got to where he is on his own, his parents literally did nothing except pay for his law mandated primary and high school education).

Those are just a few of the things they did.

ANYWAY, my sister in law phoned my husband yesterday and said she's coming back to the country for a visit and she wants to stay with us. She also wants me, her and their mom to go for lunch to make amends (something I have tried multiple times over the last decade).

I immediately said no. My husband also said no, but that he'll ask me. My sister in law said I'll say yes because I'm diplomatic.

I feel like if I say yes I'm going to just be annoyed and regret it (I work from home so there'd be no escape for me) and I feel if I say no then they'll turn it around and say that well they tried but I'm being difficult.

What would you ladies do?