So my SO and I are 20 years apart, I’m turning 23 and he’s turning 43 this year. My parents were upset at first when we were together, but then didn’t communicate with me and made like everything was ok. Invited him over for holidays, allowed him to help out with their dogs and help with errands, everything.

Long story short, they made clear to me that they still feel weird about the age difference and it’s almost been a year that we’ve been together. My dad said he talks to people and they say “what does that guy think he’s doing with such a young girl?” Everybody around us knows that we are completely functional, love each other dearly, and don’t see the age difference as anything.

My dad even invited me to their new house and said “we will not be entertaining any guests,” saying he’s not invited. My mother says “you guys are at different stages of life,” as if she even knows or has ever cared to ask what either of our “stages in life” are. My mom is a separate issue, she has alcoholic behavior and was abused as a child. But the fact that my dad has an issue and cares more about what other people think than about our love hurts me.

The idea of cutting them out hurts me but I shouldn’t have to chose between my loved one and my family. Because they are both family.