Feeling worthless


I usually never open up about my feelings or post anything online but I feel l should. Lately I’ve been starting to feel suicidal and wanting to self harm again. I feel that I’m really not good enough for anything or anyone despite what my loved ones say. I feel I’m not the super enthusiastic and down to earth daughter my mom would like to have, or the fun and crazy friend, or the protective and mature older sister my brothers deserve. I feel that I am unlovable. I recently just got out of a year long relationship and looking back at it I have no idea how anyone could ever truly and genuinely love me for me. I feel that I am too ugly for anyone to even notice, and even if someone did notice me, I’m not a super great person to get to know. Idk, I feel like I’m a bad human being overall and I feel cutting myself is something I deserve. A year ago, I felt like I had gotten so far with my mental health; i had found ways to cope with my anxiety and I stopped self harming, but ever since 2019 started I’ve gone down this dark hole again and I feel that all the progress I made for years has just been tossed out. I’m going to start going to Group therapy in a few weeks so hopefully that’ll help (I’ve never been but I was recommended to go) but does anyone have any advice on how to make these bad thoughts go away?