Is it worth it to tell

Ur SO what you did while you guys were broken up? We were broken up for about a month and I went looking for comfort in my friend because I was so hurt one thing led to another we were laying down watching a movie and we were kissing and he fingered me for like 3 seconds and I left. I felt terrible I told him it was a mistake. He never fingered me again and he’s cut off now cause he was trying way too hard to fuck and I was vulnerable. Good thing it didn’t lead to that. Anyways my SO (who is now my ex) again went out to a party he told me he didn’t dance w anyone or do anything .. oh fucking pls but I let it slide. He also told me girls were asking to get it in his car and he said no etc. anyways we tried to date again for a month and we broke up aagin because it just wasn’t working .. he will never change. He didn’t love me fr and he honestly dgaf abt me which is why I left. I’ve sacrificed a lot and he rlly did was use me when he felt like it. He was never there for me. Now he tells me I need to see a therapist and I’m crazy and I’m psycho and he says I’m sick because I’m rlly hurt rn and I’m acting out in emotion. Yesterday someone hit my car rlly hard and my neck and head were hurting although we’re broken up , we’ve been broken up since the 3rd he still talks to me everyday. He told me go get that checked out. Not even a are you okay , do u need anything , he didn’t even sound concerned at all so that made me burst into flames and realize why are we still in contact. He literally doesn’t give a fuck! I was so angry I was asking him what were his intentions with me like just leave me alone and stop tlking to me. He told me I wasted his time again and he says I need to get help. Im very angry and bitter rn because I wasted a year in a half with someone who did nothing but deceit me. We were arguing this morning and I hate him so much I just want to hurt him. He doesn’t seem phased by any of this. So I was wondering if I should’ve told him what happened to hurt him but now I realize it’s not even worth it. It’s been very toxic and I’m exhausted and tired. He’s compared me to his ex for months he’s made me feel neglected and insecure. He’s made me feel ashamed for being sensitive. I told him idc if he thinks I’m crazy rn I’m tired of bottling up my emotions i want to explode and be a mess then get back up.. that’s the beauty of having emotions.. being able to feel until you can’t feel no more. He doesn’t have emotions so he really could care less. He told me “go be a mess with someone else I don’t have time for that”. I just regret everything. I’m all over the place rn but I’m hurt and I feel betrayed and deceived. He was my first real everything. First guy I laid in the bed with and if I can take it all back I would. My thing is so much bad have been happening to me since we’ve got together and so much good has been happening to him. It was like I was his good luck and he was my bad luck ...