The worst hospital experience VENT/RANT

As of today I'm 38+6. Two days ago on Saturday night after working a long shift we thought my water might have broken. We're fist time parents and I was having contractions and leaking a substantial amount of fluid. As we walked through the hospital my contractions got stronger and closer. We got in to get checked and they ruled out my water breaking in about an hour. At this point it's 1am after we worked the busiest shift of the week. Then the nurse came in and said the dr forgot to check my cervix while he ripped me in half with the speculum, so now she'd have to check manually. This woman shoved her hand so hard into my vagina and so fast that I actually screamed. It honestly felt like she just straight up punched me. When I screamed she then LAUGHED AT ME, and told me i better get used to it if I was going to have a baby. It's now been almost 3 days and it still hurts me to even sit. Peeing is a nightmare. I didn't know when we went in that we'd have to stay for observation for 3 hours, which does make sense but honestly I've never done this before and I was exaughsted, it was almost 3am two days before we got married. After getting fisted by a stranger and being so tired and in so much pain and so overwhelmed I was honestly quietly crying while hooked up to the monitors and she ROLLED HER EYES AT ME WHEN SHE CAME BACK IN! I would litterally rather break two toes (which I've done before) then go back. I was already scared of labour and now I'm terrified of the hospital too.