first time

so i have been w my bf for almost a year already and we do a lot of sexual things but we haven’t had like vaginal sex yet... i really want to bc i love him and i think it’d be great but i am so nervous... my mom preaches “no sex before marriage” and it’s ingrained in me as this sacred thing (which it is!) but virginity is kind of like... not totally real i guess? like w my previous boyfriend i did things but didn’t feel bad or guilty.. could someone pls help me w this feeling and how to get over feeling so guilty??

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