I don’t want to be hurt anymore

I was one of the most positive person in this world, always trying to take the best out of the worse, I always smile in front of my co-workers, family and friends but I can’t hide it anymore... after I had a miscarriage my life has changed completely, it was a blighted ovum miscarriage when I was close to the 12 weeks I started bleeding at work and went to the hospital to received the bad news. my family didn’t understand why I cried, why it hurt me so bad if there was never a baby, don’t get me wrong my family is amazing but I don’t feel they understood my pain or maybe it was me overreacting but I felt horrible after my miscarriage, i felt my dreams fell apart, i was so excited for baby number two and never happened. I have been trying for 7 months and nothing, every month I think is ok maybe next month but no no no ... I can’t be positive about this anymore. All I want is cry, I felt weak, I feel like a little part in me is dying but in front of people I am a positive, strong person who always is there for you and will always cheer you up because life is so beautiful. I want a baby so much God please bless me with another one and make me strong to understand in case I can’t have another baby.