Would you date a recovering addict w/ 8 months sobriety?

Question

He has been in and out of rehab, sober livings the past 10 years. He's done it all. He is also bi polar. Regardless of all this, he is a great guy with a huge heart..

Answer

My ex has 20 years clean. I've sat in a TON of NA meetings. For his Recovery, he needs to wait a year. If you two are serious, waiting 4 more months shouldn't be any trouble before seriously moving from a platonic to a romantic relationship. I understand how arbitrary it sounds but it's a big accomplishment for him and it will give him more time to work on his Recovery and to learn to stand on his own before he graduates up to more complex relationships.

Answer

I understand drug addicts can stay sober completely. However, they can also slip up repeatedly, especially newly sober addicts. I have dealt with many recovering drug addicts in my life that I just couldn't build an actual life with one unless they were sober for many years because the majority of them ended up relapsing within a year or two.

Answer

I don’t think I could deal with that, emotionally. My cousin was in and out of rehab for drug abuse & he always put his girlfriends through an emotional roller coaster whenever he relapsed. He had a big heart but when things got rocky in his relationships, he just lost his sobriety. It was really upsetting seeing it from the outside looking in, and tbh idk if I could handle a relationship like that.

Answer

Nope.

Answer

Oooh, bipolar is a difficult one for me. My mother in law and a friend of ours both have bipolar, and as much as I love them, it’s draining to be around. Especially since both of them seem to target me when they’re manic because I’m passive and non-confrontational and even though I know they can’t help it and don’t mean it, some of the names they’ve called me are still hurtful. Our friend tried to get me thrown out of my own house when she was having a particularly bad manic episode and I will never forget some of the mean and nasty things she’s said. I’d also say that I’d never date an addict, but, if I were to consider it, they would have to be clean/sober and in recovery for at least a years before I would even consider it

Answer

I'm not interested in that much baggage. Been there, done that, I'll take in broken animals over broken humans any day.

Answer

Yes most definitely. 
But to be fair, my relationships do not tend to be that simple, calm or easy.
I usually date people who have mental illnesses, and I have dated a few people who have substance abuse issues. 
I think this could come with its own potential set of challenges, and you should consider them. 
Dating someone bipolar is interesting, but if they've worked on themselves a lot, as it sounds they may be doing, they may be a way more emotionally mature & intelligent partner than even a neurotypical person who hasn't had to emotionally regulate themselves during extremes, learn healthy coping mechanisms & learn a lot about themselves in therapy. 
My experience dating a bipolar addict was absolutely not that. He lied about his addiction and misled me, and he had not taken responsibility for working on his mental health yet. I hope he has now. He was really struggling. I had to leave because he was so mean and dismissive about my feelings. 
It sounds like your person might be working on themselves, and could be a much different story.  
Of course, there is the risk of relapse. 
Definitely get to know them for awhile if you are interested. And learn about bipolar disorder, knowing can be pretty helpful.

Answer

For me, no way. I am not NOT interested to compromise my mental health to date that guy comes with so much baggages.

Answer

Yes, unless I specifically have had issues with very similar addictions to that person. 
And I'd be honest that I'd not let it get to serious untill he has proven he can stay clean
Who would  be to just write someone of on that. At least he is going trough the wffot of going clean

Answer

As someone with bipolar make sure he’s medicated by a dr and that he STAYS in his meds (and takes them as prescribed). If he’s comfortable go with him to dr appts. My husband sits in with me (I invite him in) and gives insight into things I may not be aware of but are vital. And know that as time goes on the cocktail that once worked may not continue to work (I see my dr every three months). There are so many different meds and variations to try so don’t let him get discouraged!

Would you date a recovering addict w/ 8 months sobriety?

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