Am I being fair or ridiculous?

Question

My husband likes to play video games. He likes to play multiple times a week and whenever he plays, it’s for 6+ hours at a time. I do not like this only because I would like to spend more quality time together. I have tried to compromise with saying I would be ok with the games if it didn’t have to be an all day/all night thing. He insists that playing for 2 hours isn’t possible/worth it. I also tried to compromise with one day a week for as long as he wanted, he still wasn’t happy with that. I am currently 13 weeks pregnant and I want to spend as much time with him as possible. He gets mad because he says I only want to snuggle in bed, not do anything else (I’m not feeling well today). We got into a fight about it and now he is downstairs playing video games. 
Am I being unreasonable? I like that he has a hobby, and he likes to play with his friends online which is great. But is the quality time that I want unreasonable. 
For reference, we both work full time, spend a lot of time with our families, and he also plays an all day game at one of his friends houses once a month.
Feel free to be honest with me.

Answer

Maybe it’s because I’m also a gamer but I feel like you are being a tiny bit unreasonable. 
I know you aren’t feeling well (trust me, I haven’t been either. I’m almost 13 weeks) but maybe try and make plans with him? Like even if it’s just to watch a movie together or something. 
I couldn’t tell from your post but it doesn’t sound like he’s playing daily and tbh six hours is nothing.

Answer

You have every right to feel the way you feel. Some of your needs are not being met by your partner, and he’s being selfish with his desire to excessively game. My ex did this as well. It sounds like he could have an addictive personality, and is addicted to gaming. Fading out of reality/ stress relief and mood regulation. I wish I had advice on how to move forward with it. If conversation isn’t working and compromise isn’t working - you could try counseling? Being able to get in the same page with communication and understand each of your love languages and how you both feel loved and appreciated. It may help open the floor to a better way of finding harmony within your relationship

Answer

Oi the video games. I don't get it. I feel like they're 12. My hubby plays when I'm at work. Won't play  when I'm home but I know if he goes down there he's gone 8 9 10 hours. I don't get it. But he only does that when I'm away
 If he did that when I was home I wouldn't be cool with it.

Answer

My fiancé had this problem. He matured. He started chasing his dream career and it cut heavily into his gaming. He’s learned how to manage time even when he’s not away for work. He binge plays while I’m not available and then limits his gaming when I am home so the we can spend the last few hours of the night with each other. 
You have to really try to compromise too. I will allow for gaming if he cuts it off at a certain and comes to bed, promises me a gaming-free day, or plays with me. We got into a co-op game and love playing with each other. That may also be something to consider.

Answer

I play video games. I had to explain to family that they have no business talking to me about it if they sit for hours watching tv/Netflix or phone scrolling.

Answer

It’s an addiction. Gaming for so long is an unconscious way to distract himself from the reality of his life. A sign of depression most ignore bc it’s socially accepted. However the fact that is causing harm to you means that it got out of control and his so call “hobbie” took a toll on him. Go to Netflix, then go to “follow this” and find the episode about VIDEOGAMES. It will help you to see him with compassion and to help him to see his own problem with it and how it could be affecting him without even knowing it.

Answer

6 hours multiple times a week for a grown adult is ridiculous. I even thought 2 hours a day was ridiculous. I’d be pissed. I’m so glad my husband doesn’t like games that would be a deal breaker for me in a relationship.

Answer

Literally just went through this. I told him he had to make time for his family before video games. If he wants to play when we go to bed, fine, but I wasn’t going to sit alone and do shit while he played games. We’re a team.

Answer

My husband gave up video games after we married. His two friends were of terrible influence with this crap... I like his friends, but they were video game junkies, and lazy...it's such trash honestly and waste of life. 
Fortunately, my husband grew up, and his friends are pretty stuck in their ways and STILL living with their parents, with no gf and in their mid to late 20's!! 
My husband still enjoys other hobbies so I try to be understanding with knife collections that he has. He uses for various things, but he deserves them for as long as he takes care of his responsibilities to his family, esp his children and puts the effort in our marriage relationship.

Answer

So if it was only a once or twice a week for 6 hours i would definitely say let him do his thing but multiple times a week that’s kinda a lot. I don’t have any advice on how to make him listen and validate your feelings besides to maybe come up with a plan for the time you want with him that way he does not feel like you just want to lay in bed 🤷🏼‍♀️ 
I hope it gets better for you.

Am I being fair or ridiculous?

Let’s Glow

Glow is here for you on your path to pregnancy

25+ million

4.8 stars

20+

Getting Pregnant

Pregnancy

1st Year (Baby & You)

Baby Products