Falling out of love?.....

Question

Hey ladies I need some advices... I feel like I’ve fallen out of love with my husband to the point I don’t want to be around him anymore. He hasn’t done anything wrong I think with us having the little one we just have drifted away from each other. We have lost the romance it’s almost like we are just friends and it’s weird. We even tried going on dates with out my daughter but it still feels weird... what should I do?  Not ready to lose him but at the same time I think if we did end it , it would be as heartbreaking? I need help...

Answer

This is why they say marriage is work. You’re going to go through times where you work a lot harder than others. After having a baby is one of those times. It’s important to be honest about that with him. It’s also important to recognize your part in this. You found a different love that eclipsed the way you felt for him. It doesn’t mean you don’t love him, it means the love is different. You need to work through that on your end. Lots of marriages end after kids because the kid takes priority over the marriage. If you’re aware of that, you can work to fix it, but it will take effort.

Answer

Unfortunately this is just what happens when you enter into a marriage without building a proper foundation for the marriage and based solely on feelings.
If your love is the result of just "falling in love" you will always, eventually, fall out of love.
When your love is the result of a commitment and working together to build a proper foundation for your marriage then you understand that feelings sometimes come and go in any long term relationship, but the foundation and the commitment are always there. When you've built a proper foundation you can always find your way back to the feelings of being in love with a little work...
Have you been to talk with a counselor or therapist, either alone or with your husband? Might be time to.

Answer

Look up marriage Helper inc online

Answer

Have a conversation or two or seven with the man. 
How old is your daughter? Is this possibly ppd related? After my first, my husband and I had a really hard time getting back into our groove, but it prepared us for what would happen after subsequent pregnancies too. 
If you can’t communicate to each other what you’re feeling, and resolve to work through it, why are you together. 
Also, I won’t say that romance is dead, but love is highly romanticized, and that’s a problem, a lot of people can’t separate the Hollywood style relationships from real world

Answer

It takes work to stay in love with your partner, especially when you have a little one in the mix. I’m not religious at all, but there’s a movie called Fireproof that I would encourage you to watch (I say that because I think it’s produced by religious affiliation, but I can’t remember who).  The biggest takeaway I had while watching it was to do something kind for my husband every day when I’m feeling like you’re feeling now. It makes me more attentive to him, and he always notices. It also opens up lines of communication on what each of us wants and needs from one another. I might also speak to a professional. Sometimes our partners get the brunt of things we deal with internally. Last but not least, I’d find something to bond over. My husband loves Dune. I don’t. But, when I was feeling us drift apart, I started looking into it like he does. We suddenly had all sorts of stuff to talk about because we were sharing a common hobby.

Falling out of love?.....

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