Dear grandpa

Today marks one week since you left us.

Sometimes I stare into place.

Thinking of you

My heart skips a beat.

Knowing I’ll never hear your voice again

Sometimes I catch myself feeling normal

Then a cloud of sadness consumes me

25 years you’ve been in my life.

25 years of you loving me

25 years of me loving you

Most of the time it feels like I’m living in a bad dream I haven’t woken up from

Like one day I’ll get a phone call from you asking how the kids are.

Or I’ll see you sitting in your usual spot

Watching your usual shows

I wish I could hug you

Talk to you

Tell you how much you mean to me

You mean more to me then you could ever fathom

My heart aches to see you one last time

I still have your voicemails

My body won’t let me listen to them

I know I’ll crumble to pieces

I watched the last video you made on your phone.

You knew I’d find it.

You said hello, and stared into the camera.

Somehow I know you meant it for me

I love you , I miss you

I know one day I can think of you and smile instead of cry

But for now I’ll cry

I’ll see you again someday

Watch over me.

My dear poppop

Thank you for reading this. I’m just needed an outlet and a people to share this with.