Long story


So before I start this story and ask for advice I'm just going to put this little treasure right here ***if you can't be supportive, positive or a decent human being then please just keep scrolling***

So I've been seeing this amazingly sexy but even more sweet black man whom we shall call "Jerome" for seven months now, but here's the kicker ladies I'm married! Lets call him "Hubs" I know I know I'm such a terrible person, fore shame on me, fore shame on my family, fore shame on my cow... Now that I've been scolded for being a trollop he's not a great husband or step dad to my kids either he is an alcoholic, he is addicted to gambling, he is verbally and emotionally abusive and he doesn't give a crap about anyone but himself, I know I know "then why didn't I leave him first?" Because I couldn't he was the only thing keeping me in contact with my kids that I have from my marriage before him, that I lost because of him, and honestly I would stay as long as I need to, to continue seeing my kids, but this story isn't about that so I digress. So Jerome and I started fooling around 3 days before my 27th birthday and honestly it is mind blowing, toe curling, kinda sex and thats all it was supposed to be no strings attached, just really good sex with a good friend, well lets move on down the road about three months and feelings start to develop, we are both conflicted at this point because we both have significant others and we want to be with each other, then to add to it all our significant others think that we're all friends with each other but don't know how friendly until the day that Hubs finds text messages on my phone! Yikes! I'll save you the harsh words and tears and just say small (very large) argument pursued and I lied to my husband I said that Jerome and I were just flirting and it wasn't anymore than that, that I'll stop. But did I stop? Hell no. How could I? Jerome was everything hubs wasn't, he was exciting, funny, sexy, sweet, caring and a good person, how could I give that up? How could I just walk away from that? And honestly I was falling in love with Jerome, the more I fell in love with Jerome the less I was in love with Hubs, so now we're about 5 months in things with Jerome are getting serious Jerome had left his girlfriend and now he's only seeing me secretly of course but it's starting to really bother me because I love this man and I still have to be a secret like a side chick, I start talking to my mom about leaving hubs and moving in with my "friend" Jerome and she says to me are you just friends? I say yes because my family is super judgmental and then my own mother shocked me she looked me dead in the eye and legit said "Good, because he's you know black and I dont want that for you." All I could do was stare at her like did my mother seriously say that to me? Like I love my mom but I lost all respect for her that day. Now Jerome and I have hit our 7 month mark I have left my husband we are separated still legally married but I'm working on that, I've spent a couple nights at Jerome's house and we are trying to build a strong foundation for our relationship, I guess my whole point to this story is what do I do? What do I do about my mother and her comment/feelings? How do I break the news to my kids that I left hubs and Jerome is mommy's boyfriend not just friend? How do I tell my super racist ex husband and father of my kids that I'm dating a black man and there is a very good chance that I finally got it right the third time?