My husband and I have been married for 7 months. We have a 2 month old born unexpectedly with special needs, which has put a strain on our relationship. Lately, he’s been accusing me of cheating, since I’ve been stressed out, distant, and depressed.

Long story short, I was on his email, and see emails from a website called Ashley Madison. Look it up if you want to - it literally says, “life is short - have an affair” all over it. I look and he has a profile on there where he’s listed his height (exaggerated to be taller) weight, star sign, etc. I check and he hasn’t messaged anyone on there, or favorited anyone.

I confront him about it, and at first he denies knowing what it is, and then says that he thought it was a porn site, so he made an account, then realized what it was and deleted the account. I asked him how he found the site, and he told me it was from googling porn related things. I even googled the phrases he used and this website never came up.

This devolved into a huge fight where he broke the door because I locked myself in our bedroom. He yelled at me because I’m always telling him I’m unhappy and that I’m distant. He started yanking all of his clothes out of the closet (breaking the hangers) and packing everything, saying he was leaving (out of state) and taking our baby with him. He wouldn’t calm down and I was freaking out because I didn’t want him to take our son, especially in his emotional state (he has PTSD and any anxiety can trigger him into these anger outbursts).

I am distant and depressed, but it’s mostly because of the permanence of our son’s condition. My car is out of commission, and my days are spent taking care of my son. I only get the car on days when I have to take my son to an appointment (this month he has thirteen appointments for reference). I can’t work because of this and have no way of being independent.

I’m at a loss. I want to believe that he just thought it was a porn site, because he really didn’t message anyone on there, and there’s nothing weird on his other social media, but “the simplest answer is usually the right one” and it seems more plausible that he didn’t “accidentally” find his way on a website specifically for infidelity. His reaction makes me even more scared, because obviously this isn’t our only issue.