Anyone else struggled with body image issues before pregnancy and now during pregnancy? This is my first (now going on 14w), still not that far along, but some days I feel my past anxieties creeping up about my body.

It’s ridiculous, I know. I’m creating a new life, a little human inside me, of course my body is changing, of course it’s normal to bloat and gain weight. I keep telling myself that. And every single day I am so, so incredibly grateful and happy that I am finally pregnant after 6 years of trying. The thankfulness and love for this baby has NEVER wavered. But neither will this annoying anxiety about my body. I’m not anorexic or bulimic, but I’ve had constant body image issues for the past 15+ years and I have a problem with binge eating. I only just started feeling good about my body this year, I’d lost some weight, was weight training consistently and felt strong and healthy even tho I wasn’t as slim as I’d like. Then I got pregnant at the peak of my working out and getting in shape. I was ECSTATIC and so so excited! Then the cravings and uncontrollable eating hit me gradually. It was fun at first, seeing the random different foods I’d crave each day, but this is getting out of control. My binge eating habits sometimes come back. I want to feed my baby only healthy things but I can’t seem to control the crazy eating now. I’m just rambling, sorry, I’m not asking for anything, I just feel.. so fat and out of control, and I’m not even halfway through the pregnancy. I’m scared I’ll balloon up to an unhealthy weight gain by the third trimester and put my baby in danger. I can’t stop eating! I want to eat healthy and sensible portions but my old bad habits are coming back. Anyone else feeling like this at all? Again, I’m still so happy about the pregnancy, but worried about my lack of self discipline and control. I feel like a crappy mom already. 😢