I don't know what's gotten into me. I used to be such a happy positive person even when I was with my emotionally abusive psychotic ex, when I literally feared for my life 99% of the time. After I finally left I enjoyed my life and doing anything I wanted whenever I wanted.

I got with my now fiance and we have an 18 month old together.

Nothings going right. I'm sad literally all of the time, I want to sleep all the time, our son doesn't listen to me at all and I can never get him to just sit still. He will scream like he's dieing when I lay him down for naps or if I need to keep him in one spot for a bit. I have headaches daily, I cry almost daily. I've never, ever been like this.

I am happy though periods throughout the day it's just at some points everything comes crashing down and I get stressed out. My house is constanlty a mess, I don't have the energy to clean it even though I know I'll feel so much better when it's done, but I don't want to do it myself. I'm a stay at home mom and freelance work for a website captioning videos when I can. Otherwise I'm in my house 24/7 watching kid cartoons and having my son either scream or break things. Then my dogs, oh my God my dogs. They destroy everything. I can get a room all nice and clean and then turn around and one of them gets into the garbage, or I didn't let them outside quick enough so now there's pee everywhere. Yesterday my couch got puked on. Like I can't win.

I'm also the heaviest I've ever been and can't find the motivation to do anything about it. :(

Not to even mention relationship problems, but that's for another day.

I just want to be my old happy self again.