Stuck in the middle

So I haven't talked to my dad and almost a year-and-a-half he had left on a bad note every time he would talk about meeting up he never would so I kind of got tired of it and I stopped talking to him and now I'm trying to reach out to him again but I'm not sure what I should domy dad was a very big part of my life and it's not that I don't love him it's just that the way he left hurt me... I know a big part to being healthy is to start healing and I've never let myself actually heal but it's a start