I genuinely hate 90% of my life. I’m constantly pissed off and irritable. I’m going to explain my living situation first. Me, my husband, and our two month old live with my grandpa. I’ve lived with my grandpa most of my life, I started taking on the role of “woman of the house” in middle school. More so in high school when I became the cook and the one who did all of the grocery shopping. I moved out when I got married at 18, I moved in and out temporarily a few times due to my husband being in the military and things like that but for the most part we have lived on our own for the last few years. When I was a few months pregnant we decided to move back in, it would be easier for my husband and I to continue in college while raising a child, and my grandpa wanted us to come back so we could help out. Here’s the thing, my grandpa drives me insane. I told myself the trade off was worth it deal with him and be able to live more comfortably while in college. But Jeez I was happier working 60 hours a week than living here🤦🏻‍♀️ he’s older now so he does actually need help with certain things now, but since I was a child he’s been acting like he was helpless, so now at this point it’s like I’m just over it. When we moved in the agreement was i did the cooking, cleaning, grocery shopping,run his errand, take him to dr appts, etc. my husband deals with the yard and any other things like that. But, this man is disgusting. He showers maybe once every month or two. He says he doesn’t do much so he isn’t dirty. The man smells. Not showering combined with him not using lotion means when I vacuum I have to tuck my pants into my socks because there is so much dead skin on the floor it hits my legs. He shits and pees all over the toilet/ bathroom and acts like he doesn’t see it!! I did not sign up for this! I try to be grateful because living here does really help us, but I am not a nurse. His dr tried to sign him up for a program that sends someone to the house a few days a week to help clean and give him showers and stuff. He refused. Everything we try to do to improve his quality of life, and make caring for him easier, he refuses. He needs to be in a home. He doesn’t want to go and his daughter (his POA) won’t make him, but despite her living literally less than five minutes away, she doesn’t help take care of him at all! Nether does his other child! None of his kids come around because he is a hateful old man. Not the sweet grandpa type, more if the shake his cup of ice at you until you get him more drink type. Anytime I try to talk to him about these things he literally just says “sorry I’m such a god damn burden I bet you can’t wait for me to die” wtf?? I stay in our bedroom almost all day so I don’t have to see him but that just makes me depressed, no one wants to be cooped up like that. This is causing so much stress between my husband and I. I keep getting short with him and I don’t mean too but it feels like I’m constantly on 10, I never feel relaxed anymore and it’s making me crazy.

And a fun fact: despite the fact that I’m the one who has been taking care of him for most of my life, when he does die, I get absolutely nothing. Everything gets split between his kids. Not that I’m saying I’m entitled to anything, but it does kinda feel like a slap in the face.