I can't really describe this feeling that I'm having. I'm not sure if I'm falling out of love or if I am just bored or even fed up. I've been accused many times I've been judged many times and on top of that I have three children youngest is five months who I barely get help with. I know it was part of my decision to have kids but I did not make them on my own. These past couple of months have been very stressful. I could remember when the doctor told me to be on bed rest I would still have to cook clean and take care of my other children while I had my baby in me. I have no time to give up but I have also wasted a lot of time trying to tell my partner to help me with the baby. So far no success. I find myself praying to God to send me a helper. Sometimes I wonder if he even wanted a third child. He helps the best he can but his help is no help. When the baby cries he always asks if I fed him and when he was fed my partner will just take him on a walk to go to sleep. The majority of my partner's time is going out and smoking. And when he's not home he's outside or working. I find myself lost in this relationship many times and I don't know what to do. Talking to him is useless because he doesn't understand anything ever.