Handle being alone

How do you handle being alone . I feel like I have 0 family . I have two children and don’t want to be a part of their fathers side because it’s riddled with sex abuse and they come off as bullies when they think your keeping your kids from them but I have to do what I have to do to keep them safe . My family consist of two family’s my parents who are toxic drunks and the people who raise me who don’t even bother to invite me to holiday gatherings or even even answer a thoughtful how are you and the baby after surgery before posting on fb . Usually I try and just not let things bother me but I’m drowning and I’m crying daily over things and I’m just so unsure how to even pull myself out of this slump . I have 0 friends because I didn’t grow up around this area and the friends I did have now do hard drugs .