FAMILY VENT

I genuinely feel like my mom doesn’t love me. She provides me with materialistic things I need but is the least supportive person in my life, doesn’t bother to spend time with me, and constantly brings me down. I’m the oldest of 3 and whenever i want to spend time with them she’ll always tell me to leave and go to my room which has basically resulted in me isolating myself in this house. I don’t feel welcomed at all or that I can be myself. It hurts me even more because even though I’ve always had a tough relationship with her I love her and just want her validation and to feel like she’s there for me. It’s like I don’t exist and if I was gone she wouldn’t even care. She hasn’t said I love you to me in 4 years. I just feel so alone and no one gets how her acting this way makes me feel