At this point am I doing to much and let it be?

My husband and I having the roughest patch in our marriage. It's looking like divorce but he said he willing to go to counseling.

When I try and talk about our problems he gets upset and said he doesn't want to keep talking about our relationship he wants to have normal conversations. He has been extremely distant very secretive with his phone. My step mom over seen him texting somebody saying "I miss you too. Merry Christmas and we'll talk soon"... Somebody then called him at 2 in the morning and he ignored it twice. I asked him who that was he told me "I have nothing to prove to you the only thing that says we're married is a little paper" we have two kids today. I am going on 8 weeks postpartum. He is also fighting depression, drinking a lot, he's in the navy. When I text him or call him he doesn't answer anymore but is active on Facebook. It hurts so much I have lost 20 pounds. I am stressed out because now I might be going down the "d" path and I don't want that at all.