Gender disappointment

Most important thing is for the baby to be healthy regardless of gender and baby will be loved just as much as if it was a boy but it’s still really hard to not have some disappointment.

I found out the gender the day after Christmas. This is my fourth pregnancy and I have three girls already so I really thought this would be a boy. I even had a dream it was a boy. With my previous pregnancies I had dreams they were girls so that’s why I was so sure that this pregnancy I was getting my boy.

When the lady doing my ultrasound told me it’s a girl, I cried and then cried when I got home and later that evening. I didn’t think I was going to react so strongly about the baby’s gender but I know I was going to be at least sad about it. I know I kinda set myself up by believing my dream and taking it so seriously and with my own desire to have a boy so I guess it hit me hard.

When I was pregnant with my third girl, I had hoped I was having a boy so I was a little disappointed when it turned out I’m having a girl. Of course I love all my babies and gender isn’t an issue and I will love this baby girl just as much it’s not having a little boy is what got me sad because my husband and I decided that this will be our last baby. I also don’t want to have hope and then it turns out to be another girl.

I love my daughters and I hate that I feel sad about this pregnancy. It’s my own downfall for putting so much faith in this pregnancy it being different and all that so for sure it’s going to be a boy mentality even though I knew it could still turn out a girl. I still have moments where I feel sad especially when I see baby boy clothes. (I only bought three boy outfits in case my third was a boy and still have them so now I won’t be needing those.)

I read a lot of other posts of gender disappointment but I didn’t think It would happen to me. I was honestly really nervous while waiting for my ultrasound and I know I was expecting and hoping I would hear the words “it a boy!”. Now I just want to get past my feelings and start getting excited and ready for this pregnancy.

I know I will love her just the same and want to be excited for this pregnancy because as long as baby is healthy that’s all that really matters.

And I apologize for the long post I just really needed to vent.