I don’t know how to feel. I’ve been with him for a year. I’m very insecure and this makes me feel shitty. I’m not against any sexuality but being with someone without knowing this kind of thing is not right. For a whole year not knowing this huge part of him.

I wasn’t even looking. He was showing me something on his phone and pressed the tabs and they all showed up and there was a still frame of sex scene from pornhub and it was a dude doing it with another dude. He quickly turned the phone away and I looked away and we didn’t talk about it.

We were looking for trailer movies to see what we wanted to watch rn and at this moment I went to the restroom at the movie theater because I feel my heart so heavy.

I don’t believe he’s completely gay, perhaps bi or curious. He was messing with his “best friend” who was a female and I highly considered breaking up. We have gotten through it and it’s in the past but of course I can’t just get over it and forget it. This makes me feel more shitty and highly insecure.

I have a feeling he might be a porn addict as well. Sometimes we have sex 4+ times a day and I get tired and he can keep on going. There’s times he has to “go take a dump” about 5 times a day and I find it excessive. Him finding time to watch porn after so many sessions of sex makes me believe so.

What do I do? Should I really end it?

Maybe the answer is obvious, only a year, we are also long distance since he’s in the army and only get to see him for 4 weeks out of a whole year. I feel so sick I already threw up. I don’t want to go back to the movie. I feel my body is disgusting to him and I feel even more unwanted.

**EDIT**

I guess you guys somehow think the issue is “me thinking he’s gay” and I don’t see how tf y’all got that. It’s not even helpful “he’s not gay” “I watch lesbian porn” blah blah. I don’t care for his sexuality. I’m insecure because CLEARLY there’s some level of attraction there. It means I’m more uneasy because he has cheated in the past and now I should be worried of guys too. I can barely manage. ALSO I feel disgusting to him, like an object if anything. He watches too much porn. I’m thinking of talking to him about breaking up in a bit. I just needed time to think. Thank you all who responded.