Need a life change

So it’s become apparent that I’m very insecure.

So insecure that I’m pushing away my boyfriend and causing him to feel like he can’t breathe unless I give permission.

I have a lot of insecurities regarding myself and that basically means that I envy every other beautiful woman.

I realised today just how much this is taking over my life and I admit that right now I wouldn’t even want to be my partner - I feel ashamed and frightened.

I need to change but I don’t know how. I can’t face him right now and I’m just giving him space because I’m so scared to lose him.

Any advice on how I can turn this around?