Counting myself out....😕

Ive taken so many tests, lots of faints and maybes and even some BFN. period tomorrow and have symptoms of that...i just wanted my 2020 to start with my 🌈👶 i already 3 👼👼👼 and so tired of TTC. Im 31 and plan to stop TTC. a month after 32nd bday if not pregnant. Anyone else on this journey?