I hate my husband so much. Sometimes he’s good but most of the time he’s a little childish fucking asshole that I cannot stand. The emotional abuse is crazy. His actions ruined the only good friendship I had which also resulted in me losing my two god children who for the last 7 years of my god sons life and the last 4 years of my god daughters life I went from seeing them basically everyday (I babysat them) to not seeing them since October 1st. The final

Straw in the hat was him being an ass that night at my best friends house. I’ve had thoughts of leaving him before, but every time I’ve caved and stayed because I do love him. But is love enough? I know I have my many flaws and I’m far from perfect but I atleast keep my shit together and not say things that I can’t take back. But tonight I really just want to scream in his face that he’s the reason I lost the two best things in the world to me. The two little people that I love more than anyone at all. The two littles that gave me such happiness. I resent the fuck out of him for being such a man child. I can’t keep being his mother more than his wife. But I’m terrified of leaving him and losing the little bit of happiness I have left, when he’s not being a major asshole. Tonight he took his ring off and threw it again. This isn’t the first time and I know it won’t be the last time. But since he burned the bridge with my best friend, I literally have no one to even go. She was my only real life friend. My closest sister lives not even 5 mins away but she has her boyfriend and his kid living there and I can’t stand either of them

And my brother and niece also live there since they were evicted from another apartment. Otherwise the house is like an episode of hoarders but not nearly as bad as most of them. Next closest sibling loves 15 mins away but lives with her daughters grandmother who is a complete cunt so I couldn’t even stay there for a night without causing many issues for my

Sister. Next sibling lives in New York with her husband and two kids. So not really any room there either. I have no job because I never finished high school cause home life was beyond difficult and I didn’t have an. Adult to make me see reason to keep going. I’ve been suffering from depression since I was about 7 and I’m 31 now. I’m not on meds because we lost our insurance when he got fired

From his job back In June. We haven’t been intimate in about two months. We’ve been married since 2015 I think. I really

Don’t know what to do with this. Part of me does want to leave because we’re obviously not a good match anymore but the other side of me keeps saying “you took vows and marriage is hard and worth the trouble” but is it?