I feel like I’m just losing my mind. I take care of my daughter solely by myself. My boyfriend works full time so I can stay at home because we can’t afford daycare and we have no family to help. He works 40 hours a week Monday - Friday and when he gets home he showers hold the baby for maybe an hour if that & then she’s back to me. The one hour I get a day for myself I am doing dishes, cooking, getting things ready for her to go to bed. I go to the bathroom she’s with me, I take a shower she’s in a bouncer with me. I love my daughter I don’t mind one bit & I’m fortunate to be able to spend every second with her I’m just exhausted. I have anxiety so when she sleeps I can’t sleep. I’m exclusively breastfeeding and she has a dairy/soy allergy and now she had blood in her poop again since midnight with diarrhea so I took her back in today she’s now allergic to wheat too. I cut out everything in my diet. I have nothing to eat at home so I tried to go grocery shopping after her dr apt she started screaming halfway through so I had to put whatever I could away and leave the cart there and go home. She is finally taking a nap. I haven’t been able to have a sip of water yet this morning. Between waking up, cleaning up her poop everywhere, trying to get her a dr appointment going to the dr and then trying to go the grocery store. It’s gonna be 1pm I haven’t been able to eat. I’ve been feeling sick the past 3 days but I can’t rest because I get no help. I’m just exhausted. I commend the mommas that work full time and still do this. I’m trying my best and I feel like it’s not enough still. Wooooooo.

To make me cry even more I was crying holding her trying to rock her to sleep because she doesn’t feel good and she’s patting my face while tears are just coming down my face and she smiles at me before she goes to sleep.

I’ve been blessed with an angel I just wish I knew how to manage everything a little better or get more help.

If u read this far, thank u for listening.