I have a three year old, autistic and nonverbal toddler... and a 1.5 year old clingy beast... I have no help with them... my partner is in the military and in a school which requires him to work from 6AM until 8PM sometimes later... I have to keep the whole house clean and deal with the toddler who doesn’t seem to understand.. anything.. and a clingy toddler baby who... needs to constantly touch me or have a nervous breakdown... they live to destroy... if I take toys away they destroy the couches and unplug the router... we don’t have much furniture to deter or hide the router and it only seems to work in the one room (military housing is trash)...

I haven’t showered in two days, which doesn’t sound extreme until children use your hair as a nest for sucked on fruit snacks..

I don’t have time to fold the cleaned laundry so we’re living out of laundry baskets like four of them... my sink is full of dirty dishes... if I sit in the log hen, blocked off by baby gates.. just to drink some water or maybe coffee.. they follow me and scream for me when it’s only been three seconds... I have to beg for breaks and even then the guilt of leaving the house is astronomical... I get asked after an hour when I’m coming back and... I completely forgot who I am.. everything that made me, me... is gone-forgotten. Feels like an old friend I want to text and hang out with.. I’m just run down... I’m exhausted and.. beyond exhausted..