Jealousy and Grief... Just Venting

Need to vent and share. Went in for my first IUI yesterday (after a miscarriage in December at 8 weeks) and I was feeling so hopeful and happy. But then last night we just learned that my brother-in-law and his wife are pregnant. I am happy for them but also just jealous and angry. We started trying before them, and I think inspired them to start a family too. Now they are going to have a baby first. It's not a competition of course. But I just had this mental story of how things were going to play out and it's just not. And I keep thinking about how far along I would be now if I hadn't miscarried. It's just bringing everything up again. Plus they are already starting to give pregnancy advice when they are only just as far along as I was when we lost it 😭 why is this so hard???