Is it possible to truly love someone while fetishizing them?

Question

So I watch a lot of My 600lb life. 
A lot of the 600lb women who have been on the show are dating or married to smaller/average sized men. These men say things to the camera like "I love so-and-so for her personality" "shes such a special person, I love her, I would do anything for her" "of course I will support her" etc, etc.
Yet at least 50% of the time if not more, some men take off the second the woman starts losing weight.
They swear up and down they love her for her,
but their actions dont show it.
In LaShanta's episode her boyfriend of FIVE years took off before she had even seen Dr.Now. As soon as she even spoke the words 'I wanna lose weight' that dude was out the door.
Dr. Now says this is an issue of the dynamic of 'caregiver, disabled person' being changed. But clearly these men have fetishized the weight of their SO, and all that comes along with it (being bedbound, being completely dependent on them). And even though they 'love' their SO this fetish becomes a deal breaker. Why is it not possible for them to truly love the person they fetishize, and for that love to prevail over the fetish? 
If a relationship starts out because one person was attracted to the other because of a fetish, is it doomed? Is it authentic?
Let's say Mark has a fetish for women with dwarfism. He goes out of his way to meet a woman with dwarfism we'll call Lisa. He comes onto her hard, shes flattered, they start dating and eventually get married. Maybe even start a family. Does Mark truly love Lisa or does his fetish for her height cloud his actual judgement?
(The amount of times I had to type the word fetish is making me uncomfortable LOL) 
Anyways,
Bottom line-
Is it possible to truly love someone you fetishize?

Answer

I don’t think so /: there was this one show where the girl wanted to lose weight and her husband was angry because he liked her better big. Well shouldn’t you like her better healthy...?

Answer

I don't think you can truely love someone you fetishize. Because once they no longer fit your fetish you lose interest in them. Now if you met them and loved them before whatever became a fetish like adult nursing relationships then yes. But if what initially attracts you to them is the fetish no.

Answer

the way I see it they thrive off of being needed because when you're like 600 and something pounds your dependent on that person once you've lost that weight, you don't need that person as much as you did and then they lose that purpose and leave.

Answer

I can't help but wonder if they knew it was a fetish until confronted with the possible loss of it (Does not apply to example of Mark and Lisa). Like did they genuinely fall in love with the person for their personality, regardless of their size, etc.? Maybe they even thought at the start of the relationship that they could change them (does not work for most other fetishes, but works for weight) and get them to a healthy weight. But somewhere along the line it DOES become a fetish (not necessarily consciously), but when confronted with the possibility of change, they're forced to reflect on their own values and status in the relationship. Obviously this doesn't apply to all fetishes and fetishists, but I can see the possibility of it. As for Mark and Lisa, I guess the question would be if Mark met a woman very similar to Lisa and would want to be with her because of personality, but would turn her down because of height? Or if there was suddenly a cure for dwarfism and Lisa was given the opportunity to be a "normal" height, would he run for the hills? Of  ourse that would also depend on how Lisa feels about her dwarfism, but for argument's sake we'll say she wants to participate in the cure.

Answer

I would suppose it’d depend on the fetish.. but this particular one seems a bit unhealthy to me...

Answer

I don’t know much about fetishes, but I would imagine it’d be hard for them to see their partner as a human and not a sexual object. But I guess anything is possible.

Answer

I don’t think I’d call it a fetish. It’s more of a codependent relationship. They feel powerful knowing they make all of the decisions and take care of someone

Answer

I think if you truly love someone, it isn’t just about their physical appearance. It’s about who they are as a person too. So if someone fetishized or loved the way someone looked at 600lbs, but then decided to leave the person because they lost weight, then no I don’t think they truly loved them. I think if you have a fetish or major attraction to someone physically, that’s fine and you’re surely able to truly love that person while having the fetish at the same time. But that true love surpasses just a fetish. True love would still exist even if the person removed whatever the fetish was. Plus in this particular example, I would really hope that someone who truly loves a person would want them to be healthy and lose the weight.

Answer

I don’t think you can really love someone you fetishize

Answer

TLC used to be educational, now it's about ratings and the extreme part of reality. As far as if its possible to truly love someone while fetishizing them, I mean, it's all for ratings. Whose to say they aren't just acting? We don't know.💁

Is it possible to truly love someone while fetishizing them?

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