Drinking and smoking

We're ttc and currently in a trashed cycle due to sickness, no chance at being pregnant. Sober me quit smoking almost 1.5 weeks ago now, again lol, because it's not healthy for anyone. Drunk me will sit there and chain smoke simply because she can't remember how long it's been since the last, feel a craving and just smoke away. I've decided to drink to get drunk tonight, but do I let drunk me smoke? I'm afraid it will make sober me relapse, and I'm sick of relapsing every few months. Do I just let drunk me smoke what's left of the pack and never ever buy more again? I've already began drinking but I know it's going to be an issue later. All parties are safe, I do reserve the final say being my body, just curious what others do in situations that they used to love smoking in but they no longer smoke. I had quit this past October but then went on vacation 2 weeks later, drunk me smoked then sober me felt it was okay because I was on vacation, and it's taken this long again to get back into the mentality of quitting. I'm rambling, I know I shouldnt, but how so you tell yourself to just not when you really want to?