I have 2 nephews with 2 different women. My older nephew is 4 and i love him so much. I couldnt be there in his baby years since his mom didnt like no one in my brothers family. So it wasnt until he was 3 that i was able to see him. He is a mini me and i love it, brother hates it. Now i have a 9month old nephew. Last night was the second time i got to watch him so my brother and his gf can go ride there side by side with 10 other parents to get away from the kids a bit. I cannot have kids and i have 0 knowledge of babies, only when they become toddlers. So my husband helped. Jagir loved women when he was small, and rowan apparently likes men (daddies boy). I couldnt make him laugh at all. And it made me feel like i was doing a bad job. And here comes my husband like a pro (he has a daughter whose 7) and made him laugh and rowan always wanted him when i had him which hurt my feelings. I realized i wouldnt be a good mom. So that's probably why god took my fertility away (i was fertile af up until 2 years ago. My last miscarriage made me stop ovulating and no doctors knows whats wrong and clomid dont work) my husband was so perfect with him it hurts me so so bad that i cant give that to him. He doesn't think i know but he cries when i find out im not pregnant. My brother found the 2 of them sleeping on the couch at 3am when they got back. It was so cute