Any other unplanned mamas here?

Not to be a downer, because this group seems so positive, and that's great. I just can't seem to find anyone else on the same boat as me..

This literally couldn't be a worse time to find out I'm pregnant. It's mostly the pandemic, but it's also an awful time for me personally.

From being absolutely petrified of giving birth without someone I trust there (I've read too many horror stories about doctors), to family mostly not even knowing about my relationship with the father. I had a lot of preparing myself I wanted to do before this..

I wish so much that I was ready to just roll with this like I thought I was going to be if an unplanned pregnancy were to happen, but I'm so scared and unsure.

EDIT:

Because people like drama, the full extent of my personal life side of things...

I'm expecting my divorce to be finalized any time now. We had been together for 11 years, since high school, and married 2. Broke up beginning of January.

So to start no one will ever believe that this pregnancy and my relationship with my boyfriend aren't the reason for that. They're not. It was bad communication styles built up beyond repair (codependent, etc).

Boyfriend and I have been together something like 4 years now, and not cheating, polyamory. Everyone involved knew, everyone involved was on board.

Bf's family (that we talk to) knows about him and I. My brother has known a while. My mom found out during the divorce and hasn't come around to the idea, has asked "are we sure he isn't a con man?" None of my other family know. Bf's wife's family doesn't know.

Bf, his wife, and I live together (we have for basically 5 or 6 years).

Aaaaand add a pandemic.