what do yall think?

Question

I've always thought of marriage as teammates and idk.. my boyfriend's relationship with his mom is very close and she's definitely one of those overbearing moms which has caused a good bit of arguments in our relationship to the point where his mom doesnt even acknowledge my existence when I'm at their house because of the fact that she feels threatened and she has said to my boyfriend "no girl will ever come before me or your family"... his answer really caused my stomach to drop. 
is he right? or should I be concerned?

Answer

i think that is honestly fair. i get the history but you can’t expect him to not correct you if he believes you’re in the wrong. now there’s different ways to go about it, i wouldn’t let him be disrespectful in front of others but everyone will always have their own opinion on things.

Answer

I feel like you cant get annoyed at him for his answer to a super vague hypothetical question that would pit him against his mom. Like what kind of answer did you want? You werent specific about the type of scenario so like what if you were being unreasonable and his mom was right... you would expect him to commit right now to hypothetically side against his mother when he knows you’re wrong and she’s right? 🤔 seems like a weird thing to ask him and idk what kind of answer you were looking for!

Answer

He should live both women in his life. And find a way to resolve it peacefully. He doesn’t need to pick sides- that’s not what a good teammate would do I feel like. He would be s gentleman to both parties. Then take you aside and explain to you if he thought you were in the wrong

Answer

If you are wrong then you are wrong if his mom is wrong she's wrong, just cause they with you doesn't mean they have to agree with you all the time just cause y'all together.

Answer

I don’t thing theirs anything wrong with the answer. Although I like to think my future husband and I would show a united front around others and then at home when it’s just us if one of us disagrees with the other then bring it up then rather than causing an argument in front of other people.

Answer

I have had this same problem for 12 years. She has never come out and said something like this. However, we were 14 when we started dating, so for 4 years, he was kind of at her mercy.
Her and I have never gotten along, but over the years we have found certain things we both like to do and do it together (doesn’t hurt that she usually pays)!! However, I can flip a switch on her so quick because of the many past transgressions. He generally would also take her side because of “how I went about it”, because I’m a bitch.
We ended up coming up with 2 basic rules, which aren’t always followed so great, but we do our best. Keeping in mind, we have 2 kids, going on 3 that she wants to see all the time.
1st: if we have an issue, I generally will try my best to walk away and I tell him about it, and he is supposed to take care of it. The problem with this rule is, I don’t usually think he does an appropriate job at handling it because he is too damn nice!!
2nd: no matter who it is, agree with me in front of others, take my side; then when we are privately together you can argue, bitch, complain, criticize, yell, tell me I’m wrong; whatever it may be that he feels he needs to do. The problem with this one is in the moment, especially if you are wrong, it’s hard for the other person to agree and take your side.
All in all, do the best you can, make sure the 2 of you and your relationship is strong before anything else and if that means distancing yourself from her, so be it!! You got this!!

what do yall think?

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