need some help !

hey there ladies !!! if youre reading this and gonna comment or message me, thank you, i appreciate it a lot ! buuut heres the dealio ...

i have been raped and harrassed many times in my life (only "raped" once). and i saw a picture of the guy three times this week on social media since and it hit me ... all the times ive been, just got to me. flasbacks and all. it was like i felt them doing it again. i felt disgusted and embarrassed. i dont know why its been affecting me so much. maybe because quarantine and not being able to see my bf (since hes very caring and loving and gentle with me) and things at home with my family have been tense and i feel unwanted ... but today my dad was almost forcing me to tell me what was going on and being so mean about it. last year when i told him about me being harrassed he said it was my fault, so i dont feel comfortable telling him .. i didnt because i went with my grandparents after but he told my pap and now my grandparents have been tryna to get it out of me. but its so so hard to say. i dont know how to ... so if anyone has advice on how to discuss or overcome these feelings and trauma, please comment or message me. thanks so much ♡