Afraid

I'm 43 years old and I'm 82 days late on my cycle. I'm to scared to test to see if I could pregnant. This has been the longest I've missed my period and I'm irregular on my periods. My husband and I been together for 5 years we have tried faithfully from day 1. This past 2 years I have given up and now this? No period I dont wanna check just to see It be negative. My boobs where sore for 4 days and my nipples where sensitive too and now the feeling went away. This just happened yesterday. I know as you get older your body likes to miss with your body and emotions. It sucks I'm to afraid to check if I am or not. I cant take another NEGATIVE.......