Ok so I’m a an 18 year old girl from a super catholic family where the mantra we were raised with was “Save sex for marriage” and all that stuff. Well I have no plans to enforce that in my life and I’m a little clueless as to how I should navigate myself as a sexually active adult.

I had a boyfriend I was with from the age of 15-18 and we kissed, had oral sex, touched each other all over, but never had penetrative sex. He got STD tested about 3 months after our last sexual contact and he was completely clean. I have never had another sexual partner.

I have met a guy and we’ve been “dating” by having Skype dates and such. We’ve had no in person contact thanks to coronavirus and housing arrangements, but he’s supposed to come back to my city for school in a few weeks. I don’t even know if there would be a chance for us to have an intimate moment thanks to how things are starting to shut down again (finally) but I would like to be prepared just in case. As far as I know he’s never had any sexual partners at all.

However, my mom has scared the shit out of me about STDs. She’s telling me all this stuff about how people can have STDs without ever having sex thanks to parents and stuff. I am terrified about getting an STD and I really want to be safe.

How would I go about getting an STD test? Do you think I even need one? My ex boyfriend was clean on everything they tested him on (every STD except herpes).

Speaking of herpes, that is the one I am most nervous about. I think I have it because I get lip sores if I irritate my lips too much or get stressed out. I’ve gotten these off and on since 2nd grade and I don’t know how I would’ve gotten it (my mom didn’t even let me share water bottles with anyone as a kid). I don’t know what else it could be and I’m worried. The good thing about herpes is it isn’t as painful or dangerous as other STDs, but there’s no cure.

If I take an STD test and I have something, how would I bring it up to a partner? Especially if it’s herpes?

ALSO ONE MORE IMPORTANT THING:

I have never gotten the HPV vaccination. I had the opportunity to when I was younger but my mother didn’t get it for me. Super worried about getting that STD (that’s another one that my boyfriend got tested for and it came back negative). How would I go about getting the HPV vaccine as an 18 year old???