It’s so strange knowing that I was pregnant and now I’m not. I lost baby #2 this week. I was roughly 6-7 weeks and started bleeding heavily on Monday.

The bleeding has almost stopped, and the pregnancy tests are almost negative, but my heart is nowhere near done with the feelings.

My husband and I have never been closer and I look at my daughter in a new light. Those are the 2 positive things to come out of this. And that’s what I have to focus on. But with every smile is guilt, with every glance in the mirror is shame, and with every cramp is deep sorrow. I thought when the bleeding was done I’d feel better, but I’m actually more sad as now it’s something that was, not something that is. It’s in the past, but feels so fresh.

I’m sure time will heal, but it sure hurts like hell.