Was I assaulted or raped? Or none

Question

I was giving my bf head and I obviously didn’t want to, I was literally tearing up but I didn’t say anything to him. Is this considered rape or assault or am I just over reacting? He says I am

Answer

Based on JUST what you’ve said here (there could be other things that happened but you didn’t say so, so I’m just going off what you said) you were neither raped or assaulted. If at no point before or during you said no/you didn’t want to/etc, then it’s just basically doing something you didn’t want to do but agreed to anyways. Now, I don’t think you’re overreacting. I’ve had instances where I did something I didn’t necessarily want to for my partner, and it did make me feel upset, even violated, etc afterwards, so I would say your feelings are valid. But I chose to do it anyways (as did you), so there was no assault. Best of luck dear and please don’t be afraid to stand up for yourself and say no!!❤️

Answer

If you’re crying and someone doesn’t get the memo it’s rape. 
I am pretty sure I’d stop doing things to my husband if he was crying.

Answer

So, as a survivor...this is kind of a difficult subject. If you just reluctantly did it to please him...it’s not either. Sometimes, we all do things to please our partners even if we aren’t specifically in the mood to just because each want them to feel satisfied (obviously I mean in context of no force being used, this by no means signifies that you HAVE to...however, it happens. Especially when you’ve been in a relationship for awhile) 
***NOTE: I am not at all supporting or saying that being a relationship doesn’t mean that the person can’t sexually harass/ harm you so please please try to understand my horribly worded statements and know that this stuff can 100% happen and is an issue, I do not defend that AT ALL..
Was he holding your head so you had no other option? Did you express to him in any manner before or during that you truly didn’t want to do this? Did you just not feel like you wanted to please your partner? Do you feel extremely violated and did he use some form of force or bribe to make you do it? I tear up while giving head, simply because there’s something hitting my throat. (Not saying that anything did or didn’t happen) just saying that tearing can happen. There’s just a lot of questions that come into play here that would need to be answered to fully understand your situation.

Answer

Did you say no or express to him that you didn’t want to do that?

Was I assaulted or raped? Or none

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