After 12 incredible weeks spending every second with my baby boy, today i went back to work. It didn’t go well. I made myself physically sick with worry and sadness. I hysterically cried multiple times. I REALY TRULY did not expect to feel like this. It was so much harder than I ever imagined and i literally still feel sick to my stomach thinking about doing it all again tomorrow. I am finally with him now and he just seems soooo off and it is killing me to see him not himself. He just seems So sluggish, disconnected...not himself and not how he usually seems. I can’t help but wonder if he felt the affects of me not being there when he has been so used to being with me constantly. I feel heartbroken and guilty. Please please tell me this gets easier. It was so awful... and I felt ridiculous with how emotional I actually got 😔💔

My love...