My brother died in June. My family is still completely shaken by the trauma of it. I was 20 weeks pregnant at the time. So I’ve been going through a lot of depression since then. My husband says that I’ve been handling it great and after our daughter Fiona is here I might see someone to talk.

I posted on here about how my “best friend” was planning a shower for us to cheer us up of sorts. She never sent out the invites and lead me to believe that no one was coming to the shower. So I thought people didn’t want anything to do with us. We canceled it on and Sunday and with trying to cover for herself she mailed the invites out the next day. Then she stopped talking to me. Wouldn’t return any of my calls or texts. Nothing. Completely ghost.

So two days ago I reached out to her. This is someone who I have known for almost 20 years. I didn’t want to just walk away from the friendship. We all make mistakes. We just have to own them and move on. I’ll put the screenshots of the convo here. I’m in the color. Chase is her 11 year old son who couldn’t have a huge birthday party back in May because of lockdown. Oh and the church shower was a surprise shower that my church threw together because they were sad that our shower got canceled the way it did. We had nothing to do with it. 

Needless to say we’re no longer friends. Everything was my fault and I need to get over my brother’s death because that’s what she would do. I’m heartbroken that someone so close to me said such things. My heart had been through the wringer the passed two months. There are days that I feel like I’m walking through mud around my ankles and other days it’s around my knees. Everyone is telling me to cut her out and not to look back. But a 20 year friendship?