Just need somewhere to talk I guess

So, I am married and currently going through a divorce. Its been a long process, not because of holding on to the relationship or anything but just because I never have time or money to get the paperwork going.

Anyways, while I was married my ex-wife and I were trying to conceive... it never really worked out. She took once, but miscarried very early on... and after that, over the following 3 years, we could never conceive again.

We have been separated for over a year now, and I still desperately want a baby. I want desperately to be pregnant. I had a scare with an ex boyfriend a few months back, and even though I knew it was the wrong time and the wrong person.. when I finally got my period a month and a half later and I then tested negative... I cried.. I understand that babies are not easy. I understand that they are incredibly expensive and they take all of your time and they’re loud and messy and... I want that. So so badly.. and now, I’m talking to a great guy and I’m not in any hurry for the future.. but the longing for a baby never goes away..

Is this normal? Does anybody else ever want a baby this badly even knowing it’s just not at all the right time?