it takes forever for me to orgasm

so when i masturbate it’ll take me about half a hour or more to cum and during sex it takes even longer, sometimes i dont even get to cum. i think its built up anxiety from taking too long but i cannot stop it :( when i masturbate my mind wanders and i end up thinking abt things completely unrelated and then during sex i feel like i keep rushing it bc i dont wanna end up not being able to orgasm. my partner is really good at sex and it does feel amazing but like..... nothing happens. i thought that maybe if i receive oral for a long time i’d be able to cum but we tried that and although i felt like i was getting close nothing happened. i also tried using a vibrator but i still didn’t cum and we went for a long time. i could use some pointers if anybody has experienced this 🥺