Am i tripping or?

Question

My “boyfriend” went out the other night and didn’t tell me anything. I woke up and saw that he went out but I saw it on his cousins page who I’m friends with on social media. I confronted him and just said “hey, I didn’t know you went out last night. You never said you were going anywhere”. And he really didn’t have too much to say. He happens to do this a lot. I’m just sitting there confused because he never mentioned that he went out even the next morning. All I ever ask is for him to tell me if he’s going out and that he made it back in safe and he just won’t do it. My question is, if your spouse went out is that something you feel that they should tell you or no? Because maybe I’m tripping....

Answer

So is it your spouse or your boyfriend? That's 2 totally different things. If you dont live together he shouldnt have to tell you when he goes out. He May feel like you are overreacting and smothering him. He May feel like you are too controlling and he doesnt want someone who is acting like his mother.

Answer

Do you live with him? Then it’s courtesy that he should probably learn to do. If you don’t live with him, then he definitely doesn’t need to tell you everything he does. He’s allowed to have a life and no he doesn’t need you to keep tabs on him. You’re not his mom. He’s a big boy and can handle himself.

Answer

Boyfriend and husband aren't the same thing. You're not his mother and he doesn't have a curfew. I get wanting to know he got home safe but he doesn't owe you check ins and he doesn't need your approval or permission to go out. 
Is my husband obligated to check in with me if he's going to be out late? Yes because we're married with an infant son and another on the way. If there's an emergency we need to be aware of where the other is.
The relationship dynamics are not equal.

Answer

It sounds like you don’t trust him 🤷🏼‍♀️

Answer

Why is “boyfriend” in quotes?  
Do you live together?  Does he have to tell you where he goes all the time?  Does he maybe not tell you because you over react?

Answer

You’re tripping. I say that because he isn’t a spouse. And from you using quotation marks it implies that he isn’t even a boyfriend rather a friend with benefits or someone you’re only causally seeing. Unless he’s your spouse or someone you’re in a serious living-together partner, he’s not obligated to tell you when he goes out.

Answer

I dont understand why you think your boyfriend should tell you when he's going out if yall don't even live together. Sounds to me like you're just using that as a reason to always know what hes doing; like you dont trust him

Answer

Do you live together? If not, then.....no it isn't any of your business.

Answer

“Boyfriend” and spouse are not the same thing. Unless he put a ring on it, he is not ur spouse. You don’t own him. He’s at free will to do what he wants to do. You guys are not on the same page and you’re expecting more out of the relationship than he’s willing to give.

Answer

Spouse and boyfriend are 2 different things. Not sure what “boyfriend” is. If you 2 are simply messing around and there is not true label then he can pretty much do whatever he pleases. 
Have you 2 talked about boundaries before? That would be something to discuss to save you both a headache and heartache.

Am i tripping or?

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