Am I the asshole?

Question

My family and I just moved to a new house in a new town. My husband works remotely from home full time and works 3 nights a week part time doing 3-4 hour shifts. 
My husband says that I should be doing everything around the house because he deserves to relax and lounge around after work and on weekends. I’m a stay at home Mom of 3 kids aged 5, 3 and 6 months. 
On top of cooking, cleaning, shopping with zero help, I do remote learning with our Kindergartner. My husband literally cannot function without me. I tried to go to the store the other day quickly and he called me screaming he didn’t know how to log our Kindergartner back into Zoom after lunch. 
Any time I go to the store for some sanity (I’m EBF a clingy teething 6 month old who refuses a bottle), I get text messages to hurry back home. 
I just feel like I can’t catch a breather without feeling my husband breathing down my neck. 
Any time I ask for help with something he says I’m lazy and that this is why I raise the kids and he works. I also didn’t mention that I stopped working my hospital job part time on top of all of this right after I gave birth in March. 
Is it me or is my husband delusional and lazy? I blame his Mom for giving him this mind set. I told him this isn’t fair. I was raised in a household that my parents each contributed the same 50/50. My husband says nah, women should do the work.
He wasn’t always like this. I feel like he’s just getting lazier and lazier as the years go by. We’ve been together 11 years and married for 7.
I love him but I just feel so tired!!!

Answer

You are definitely not an asshole. Idk how grown adult men can’t help around the house...my SO and I both fulfill our household responsibilities

Answer

Nah, he’s a poor excuse for a husband and father. Yeah, he works two jobs, but he isn’t special. He isn’t the only one working. If raising kids was so easy, he wouldn’t have to consult with you every time you aren’t there for five minutes.

Answer

I currently have a 3 year old and 7 week old, hubby works every day including weekends and he still helps whenever he can he nearly always puts our 3 year old to bed because im dealing with a grizzly newborn, I wouldn’t expect him to do 50% but he would if I asked him. There’s really no excuse to help out

Answer

Turn your phone off next time and go get a pedicure

Answer

Girl you have to stand up for yourself, otherwise all will take you for granted. You are his wife not servant. All eork should be 50:50. The house is his too, kids are his too. This things should be set up straight from the beginning. But anyway try now.

Answer

You didn’t make those kids by yourself so you shouldn’t have to raise them by yourself!! If he can’t handle something as simple as helping his child with online schooling then he shouldn’t have had kids. It doesn’t matter how much he works, he still has a responsibility to his children.

Answer

Im a sahm and my husband works 60 hours a week. He still helps out with our almost 16 month old. He also helps with cooking and cleaning. On his days off he will take our son out into the living room or to the pool so I can get a break or take a nap. Your not being an asshole your husband just needs to do better.

Answer

I feel for you. I also feel like my mil did too much for my hubby and she is a big reason he is how she is too so I get it. When I met him he was 33 and she was still picking up his laundry and didn’t it for him and getting his groceries my house wasn’t like that my dad helped even though my mom stayed home.

Answer

You need to start popping out and leaving your phone at home for starters...

Answer

No you’re not seems like you’re husband is the asshole being at home cooking, cleaning, chasing after the kids is a job in itself he should be helping you out smh

Am I the asshole?

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