How do you open up?

Question

I’ve always felt really self conscious and guilty during sex because of my upbringing, and felt like I had a wall up that kept me from letting go and enjoying the moment. I just feel awkward during sex. I can’t get out of my head. Has anyone else felt this way and how did you overcome it?

Answer

Top comment is 100% right.  Personally my orgasms are bigger with anal ? 
But anyway, i get in my head a TON too. Sometimes it stops me from orgasming and sometimes it ruins the moment. But thats where its nice to have an understanding partner.
Try not to focus on your partner to much, be selfish a little. But dont be scared to try and turn them on too but you can grow to explore that more when youre comfortable.  Also..try being on top, it gives you the control to explore what you like. 
Focus on what feels good to you. Closing your eyes or turning the lights out helps me focus on how it feels and takes the pressure off.
Also, using a toy on your own helps you get more confidant and comfortable with your own sexuality. If thats something you're ok with using.

Answer

I think the more comfortable you are with your partner, the easier it is to let things go. I think the more times you were with them, and you get used to them and you get used to it whenever you’re feeling, and if you have feelings for this person as well, it’s probably easier to let go. You also have to understand that what you’re doing isn’t wrong, unless it is like you are in minor and they are a grown man kind of situation. But I think the more comfortable in the more you care about the person I think you’ll eventually that wall will come down, I think when you’re in the moment, and you really care about that person, or you love that person, or more emotionally attached to that person, and the more times you do it as well, I think just be preventative, if you weren’t trying to get pregnant, as best as you can, using both birth control and condoms, because if one fails, the other is your back up, and then you never have to worry about pregnancy scares or abortion or Plan B etc. just be safe and careful that’s all you can do. ￼￼

How do you open up?

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